Business Cards Albuquerque


I'm both a physician and someone who has had significant life threatening and incapacitating illnesses. A few comments.

Yes, do be there. But as someone who has been so incapacitated that it took all my strength to sit up and eat in a hospital bed without getting significantly short of breath, use your common sense. As a patient in the hospital it's amazing how you somehow feel you have to play the host. So if you do visit me, say I'm just here to be with you, I'll just sit here and I don't expect you to do anything. That's enough for me as a patient. You can place your hand on my arm, if appropriate.

Let me sleep. Let me wake and see you still there. That's really all I want you to do. If silence is uncomfortable, then send me a truly personal note or something humorous, but only if you know me well. I've kept the notes and cards people sent and still pull them out when I need a pick-me-up. When I get home, do bring soup.

I agree that having friends available to help in the long run are invaluable, but they are rare. Count yourself lucky if you have one or two. And remember, everyone in the family is struggling too.

Not only shouldn't you say "you'll get over it", whatever you do, please don't offer your advice on how to deal with my problem -- however much you think I would benefit. I'm worried enough. I need confidence in those caring for me. If I need help, I'll ask. I promise.

And if faith doesn't always provide answers, it often provides hope. I hope that helps.

168 2017-08-22 01:35:47 - Harlan Kutscher

So where is the direct threat to the US? Why are we at war AGAIN? The entire region has a 2,000+ year history of petty warlords who rise up, conquer land, brutalize their population and then collapse. We were in Iraq for over 10 years, the minute we left both the government and army folded like a house of cards. No one has made a difference in the region, not US, the British, the Ottomans, etc., etc. We need to walk away and leave them to their own fate.

We should be spending our trillions on improving the lives of our people at home. For this kind of money we could have:

Ended hunger in the US
Ended homelessness in the US
Rebuilt every run down school in the US
Revived the economy in the US
Fully funded ObamaCare
Fully funded the pension plan of every city and company in the US

Mr. President, when is it our turn for an aid package?
When will you put the US first?
Isn't making us successful your job?
When are you going to start?

199 2017-04-23 09:06:31 - Bruce

I would add that the Catholic Church, in the Middle Ages and early Renaissance, was itself a totalitarian system. It is striking that Douthat exempts this example of our susceptibility to totalitarian regimes even as he laments it. A global religion is not a contrast to Fascism and Communism - it is an example of the same thing. In between these bouts of concentrated power may come brief summers of decentralization, but it is hard to argue that there has ever been an extended period in any society where more than a few individuals held all the cards. The US may have experienced a period of balanced power between the election of FDR up to the election of Ronald Reagan, when unions were strong, and our culture and tax structure helped to keep the beast on a leash. If so it has long since waned, and delusions about their own "individuality" among twenty-somethings surely help our burgeoning plutocracy more than harm it.

2 2017-02-14 08:43:11 - tony zito

This piece was smart. One point to add (or maybe it was implicit):

There's a fair amount of sentimentalism, even masculine self-pity, in the elegiac attitude toward patriarchy in the three TV shows you've singled out. Yes, it may signal the actual fading of patriarchy. But it could also indicate the tendency of patriarchy, still very much alive, to feel sorry for itself.

This sense of loss would not be so much a testament to an actual event but rather a permanent feature of patriarchal authority, whose underside is a feeling of insecurity, or an endless mourning for a fictional time of "how things used to be" (i.e. we men used to have all the cards, but now we're under attack, etc.). This would be the complementary obverse of Fiedler's perception of the permanent male adolescence of American literature.

One last thing to add to your thoughts about critically acclaimed TV shows. I like "The Americans" so much because it's about adults dealing with decidedly adult problems and ambiguities. Just as crucially, it's about two adults, a woman and a man, who view their situation sometimes in the same way, but often very differently.

3 2015-08-10 12:06:11 - Jim

Politically, this could be bad for Democrats in 2016. Oregon, a liberal Democratic stronghold, recently trounced a ballot measure that would have issued "Driver Cards" to illegal residents, by a margin of more than two-to-one. That was legislation already passed in the Democratic state legislature and signed into law by the Democratic governor, undone by huge margins in a decidedly liberal state. A liberal state that legalized marijuana in the same election. I think the media and some Democratic lawmakers are mis-reading the opinions of liberal voters, who stay quiet about their true misgivings on the rampant illegal immigration taking place, for fear of being labeled "racist".

2 2014-11-15 18:10:17 - Just Curious

Post to Business Cards Albuquerque (login required)

5VW to Pay $1.2 Billion to U.S. Dealers Hurt by Diesel Scandal33Demise of the Southern Democrat Is Now Nearly Complete799Inequality Is a Drag957A Scourge Is Spreading. M.T.A.’s Cure? Dude, Close Your Legs.489The Wolf Hunters of Wall Street1194Living Wages, Rarity for U.S. Fast-Food Workers, Served Up in Denmark989The Battle for New York Schools: Eva Moskowitz vs. Mayor Bill de Blasio104The Profits-Investment Disconnect580U.S. to Commit Up to 3,000 Troops to Fight Ebola in Africa245Living on Purpose409Staten Island Man Died From Chokehold During Arrest, Autopsy Finds355Poor Sanitation in India May Afflict Well-Fed Children With Malnutrition775After Losing Scottish Independence Vote, Alex Salmond Will Resign323How Billionaire Oligarchs Are Becoming Their Own Political Parties1Cambodians Gather to Pray, Offer Gifts for 'Killing Fields' Dead1338The Extraordinary Science of Addictive Junk Food108My Selfie, Myself1457Children and Guns: The Hidden Toll374A Political Crystal Ball219An Affair to Remember, Differently52Live Updates: Aftermath of Grand Jury's Decision in Michael Brown Shooting in Ferguson1511Shooting Accounts Differ as Holder Schedules Visit to Ferguson101Teenagers Stand Up to Backpage4380A Plea for Caution From Russia818How Obama Lost America334Death by Data281In Florida Student Assaults, an Added Burden on Accusers1625A Punch Is Seen, and a Player Is Out164 The Shifting Politics of Cuba Policy 2207Under Pressure, Cuomo Says Ebola Quarantines Can Be Spent at Home652Germany Fights Population Drop494Trayvon Martin Case Shadowed by Series of Police Missteps167It Takes a Mentor622House Votes to Sue Obama for Overstepping Powers597Don’t Muzzle the Clown443The Humanist Vocation192Weak Oversight, Deadly Cars163More on Sleeping Pills and Older Adults1092The Big Lie Behind Voter ID Laws 128‘Princelings’ in China Use Family Ties to Gain Riches495Doctors Denounce Cancer Drug Prices of $100,000 a Year445Let’s Reject the ‘Inevitable’530Will Portland Always Be a Retirement Community for the Young?733On Election’s Eve, G.O.P. Is Confident, but Voters Are Sour118The Building Blocks of a Good Pre-K 1031One Day in an Elevator With Obama, Then Out of a Job630Ultra-Orthodox Shun Their Own for Reporting Child Sexual Abuse290Cuomo’s Gun Law Plays Well Downstate but Alienates Upstate 999Why Are There Still So Few Women in Science?449Alice Munro Wins Nobel Prize in Literature